Unorganised & Unprepared

Ian Hawkins 0:02

Are you ready, ready to release internal pain to find confidence, clarity and direction for your future, to live a life of meaning, fulfillment and contribution to trust your intuition again, but something's been holding you back, you've come to the right place. Welcome. I'm a Ian Hawkins, the host and founder of The Grief Code podcast. Together, let's heal your unresolved or unknown grief by unlocking your grief code. As you tune into each episode, you will receive insight into your own grief, how to eliminate it and what to do next. Before we start by one request, if any new insights or awareness land with you during this episode, please send me an email at info at the Ian Hawkins coaching.com. And let me know what you found. I know the power of this work, I love to hear the impact these conversations have. Okay, let's get into it.

Have there been times where you've felt unorganized? unprepared? Maybe there's still times where that shows up. Things when you get better. It doesn't mean that these patents don't still raise their ugly head occasionally. So as I always say, acknowledge where you got better, but just understand that now you're starting to tweak the one percenters or the 0.1 or 0.01 percenters? Take your performance to a whole other level. Just not getting down on yourself. When that happens. It's just recognizing it. Now the unorganized and unprepared where does that come from? Often modeling, often from how someone spoke to us about a situation. Now we'll give you a great example. I'm a finisher. When I've got a time deadline, and something's coming towards the finish, my whole productivity goes through the roof. And acknowledging that and realizing that that's good, that's fine. And means I can work around that and start creating more deadlines for myself. Takes me back to being a young kid. I'd always get my assignments projects done at the last minute. And I had the same conversation with my mom, you might even recognize that you might have had some with some of your children at some point. Why have you left this to the last moment? Well, for me mainly was because I was outside playing the last few whether it was homework, while I was out playing sport or on my bike or playing with mates around the streets. Why would I want to do homework, but then you get that judgment and you get that reaction creates a pattern. Something I mentioned yesterday's episode that the guilt

so this pattern is playing out later in life, that this idea that you've been told, or you're unorganized. You're always leaving things to the last minute. And you start believing it because you hear it enough. When the reality is complete something completely different. Well, you might have modeled it same parent or sibling or important person who was telling you that you're you're you're organized, you're unorganized, you're prepared, whatever it is, was probably projecting their own stuff. And they were probably modeling the same behavior to you, which you observed and then copied. Not even your stuff. Frustrating, right? blame your parents for everything, that I'm just joking. They're doing the best they can and did the best that they could with what they were what they experienced. And same as you you're doing the same. You're doing the best you can doesn't mean you can't improve it though. You can certainly get better. There's recognizing the patterns, thinking about where it might have formed, creating a new pattern, rewriting the story. And if you need you may need to bring in that circuit breaker. Something to break the pattern. And importantly, if you're someone who goes and visits Kinesiologist or Reiki or acupuncture or whatever something that's create allow you to create a change, you still want to embed the new habit. Otherwise you will default back to the old pattern. So yes, we need to make peace with things but we also need to build powerful new habits Otherwise, you won't have the same emotional reaction to different situations, but they'll still play out. They can be more frustrating because you're like, Oh, I thought I'd heal this, I thought I'd change this, I thought I'd release whatever that was. Thought I've made peace with this. And yet here it is showing up again. Still change the habit. habits we can change. I remember my brother, when he just decided he's going to quit smoking. I think it might have been before they were having children or look at what it was, but 20 years ago, he said, I just decided and I stopped the as I want people can't. Just amazing like, when you got the motivation, you make a decision, you can change things, you still have to change the habit and as he would admit he he at times when when people were out and he would have a carrot steep between his fingers just due to shift that habit until that became no longer a problem either.

To go easy on yourself. Don't buy into the concept you are unorganized or unprepared or anything else. Any other label that you give yourself lazy, unmotivated, whatever it is, don't bind to that label. You are, how you are, which you can decide whatever that is, you can decide that you're productive and successful and all those different things. And just acknowledge there be some other patterns you need to change and other habits you still need to change because that will be life will continue like that. And it's important to give yourself that space, knowledge what's there. Keep moving forward. Keep moving forward, and be kind to yourself as you do.

I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Code podcast. Thank you so much for listening. Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief, let's chat, email me at info at E and Hawkins coaching.com. You can also stay connected with me by joining the Grief Code community at Ian Hawkins coaching.com forward slash The Grief Code and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal. Please subscribe and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform