Ep 447 - The ABCD Of High Performance: Control

Ian Hawkins 0:02

Are you ready, ready to release internal pain to find confidence, clarity and direction for your future, to live a life of meaning, fulfillment and contribution to trust your intuition again, but something's been holding you back, you've come to the right place. Welcome. I'm a Ian Hawkins, the host and founder of The Grief Code podcast. Together, let's heal your unresolved or unknown grief by unlocking your grief code. As you tune into each episode, you will receive insight into your own grief, how to eliminate it, and what to do next. Before we start by one request, if any new insights or awareness land with you during this episode, please send me an email at info at the Ian Hawkins coaching.com. And let me know what you found. I know the power of this word, I love to hear the impact these conversations have. Okay, let's get into it.

The Sea of high performance is control. As in self control, as in what can you control, controlling the controllables the moment you start trying to control things externally to you is the moment your performance will dim. But the moment you come back to self control, controlling what you can control, then you own your power. You get to control your destiny. Now sure, there are external things that are gonna have an influence there. And if it's a competition where you performing, then it will be dependent on the other people that you're competing against. But it's rare that that actually negatively impacts your performance unless you allow it to because you still have to be in control of how you show up. Now being someone who used to be a big blamer of different situations, people circumstances, I can understand why people do this. On the other side of that though, it actually frustrates me when I hear people we're dealing with a coach when I show up and people are talking about the state of the pitch. The weather, the referee are this referee is this. The other? Yeah, any anything the team were playing Yes. And it's like that they are all out of your control. And don't give it any energy. Apply it to a work situation. You can complain about the boss, you can complain about colleagues, you can complain about the working environments, we can take ownership and control what you can control. Changing your behavior in those situations, making a conscious decision to move to a different workplace. There's plenty of different choices you can make in your control. If I show up more positively in this situation, in this circumstance in this environment, can I create more positivity through the whole environment? And the answer to that is always yes, of course you may come against resistance from that. But if you're persistent, you will continue to have a positive influence. And again, if you bring it into the home environment, it's really easy in that home environment to assign blame because we've been brought up in a blame culture. We've had it drummed into us from a young age from parents who grew up in a similar environment. And then we have it reinforced to us through the TV through TV shows through the news through social media. You see people blaming all over the place giving up their power giving up their control reacting emotionally now you can sometimes get your best performance if you're reacting emotionally but it's always got to pay off it's got a downside that it might be that then you then spend time beating yourself up or talking down to yourself or that negative inner voice afterwards because you've gone to links that you prefer you didn't to get a performance or you might find that because you are throwing yourself into this performance in a way that is not what your body needs then it can have a detrimental detrimental impact you physically mentally emotionally, spiritually either in the short medium or more often than not longer to so everything's gonna cost you want to pay the right price. And why focusing on control? controlling what you can control It's a price always worth pay. And it makes me think of the line from. Again, I get these two confused all the time, either Jim Rohn, or Les Brown or listen to both of them so much in those early years. But if you think the pain of change is bad, then imagine the pain of regret. If you're paying the price, pay the price of change of improvement. Because the pain of regret lasts a lifetime. The pain of change is short term only. So take control of your performance by focusing on what you can control and what you can control only.

I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Code podcast. Thank you so much for listening. Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief, let's chat. Email me at info at Ian Hawkins coaching.com You can also stay connected with me by joining the Grief Code community at Ian Hawkins coaching.com forward slash The Grief Code and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal. Please subscribe and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform